new year, new me!
just kidding. it’s 2018 and i’m still the same old me. plenty wonderful with plenty of room for improvement.
i set a few resolutions for this year and they all center around one big theme: living intentionally.
somewhere along the way, i fell into a lifestyle of habit. we’re all creatures of habit to some extent or another, and only you can decide if you’re happy with how your spontaneity versus predictability lines are being drawn.
what i will say is that it’s astounding when you acknowledge the size, breadth, and impact of habits. take a second to reflect on some of yours.
even something as small as always taking your coffee with sugar or leaving the toilet seat up. never getting to bed before midnight. checking your work emails at the dinner table. always choosing the bottomless option at brunch. when you calculate how often every day, every week, every month, every year a habit impacts you or those around you – it truly merits some active attention.
i’m happy, but as always, i can do better. (i’m very type a, so i’m constantly striving to improve.) i want to eliminate habits, leaving only the best to be nurtured, to clear room for more spontaneity, exploration, and self-development.
my worst habit? i stopped making conscious decisions on the small stuff. quite literally, my worst habit is due to habits.
take food. over the last year, my routine was extremely predictable. i’d skip breakfast. i’d grab a big lunch out. then, too tired from my commute to cook and home so late that the whole foods nearby was closed, i’d order food in for dinner. if i wasn’t paying for delivery, i was eating out, drinking dinner (read: red wine), or heading straight to bed.
every day, my belly was filled carelessly with whatever was most convenient.
then my mom said, “what is postmates, and why are you spending all of your money on it?” (i let my parents have access to my bank accounts.) (i must have single-handedly kept postmates in business last year.)
and i realized that over time, my small, go-with-the-flow acquiescences and mindless decisions (and let’s be honest, lazinesses) had snowballed to create a habit that was neither healthy nor financially responsible.
maybe you can relate.
i’ve got several of these habits, where i act before questioning my intent behind said action. impulsive shopping habits. comfortable relationship habits. (non) exercise habits. dear lord, so many habits. not all bad, but not all intentional.
in 2018, i want to recalibrate and recenter my lifestyle. eat intentionally. date intentionally. spend intentionally. dress intentionally. be. intentionally.
so join me on the struggle (journey – i meant journey) to live intentionally. to acknowledge each opportunity to choose to be more thankful, patient, innovative, healthy, frugal, eco friendly, present, fashionable, unique, educated, generous, whatever! to be you, intentionally you, whoever that may be. it’s going to take real introspection and effort. i’m up to the challenge. are you?
p.s. – i cancelled my postmates unlimited subscription this week. from instant meals to instant progress. fuck yes.
p.p.s. – if i ever find the tinder conversation i had with a postmates founder, where i told him my mom was upset with how much money i was spending due to his app, i’ll post it here. haha. yeah. that happened. his profile popped up an hour after she asked me about the postmates charges, so i had to swipe right for kicks. it was a sign from the tinder gods.